A Perfect Day for Your Colon in New Mexico
Anybody who has ever read a guidebook has seen those annoying "A Perfect Day" itineraries...
A PERFECT DAY FOR YOUR COLON IN NORTHERN NEW MEXICO
1. Start your day with a colon-blackening beef brisket burrito at Sugar's on the low road between Taos and Santa Fe. We stopped here twice, once on the way to the Pecos Wilderness via Taos, and again on the way down to Ojo Caliente Hot Springs. The smokehouse advertises itself. The brisket spends two days in the smoker, accumulating enough tar to transform your colon into a hazardous waste site. Make sure to get a side of Sugar's sweet, slightly spicy sauce to go with the accompanying green chile sauce.
Me holding an imaginary brisket burrito in front of Sugar's. The burrito has already been vaporized, along with my colon. I made sure to get another burrito to go, since my digestive system had already become a demolition zone, anyway.
2. Purge and purify your colon with a detoxifying mudbath at Oyo Caliente Hot Springs. Douse yourself in in the iron, iron/arsenic, and soda pools to aid in the resurrection of your colon. Drink copious quantities of springwater from the Lithia spring to deal with the post-traumatic stress of finishing your second "to go" burrito.
Me at Oyo Caliente Hot Springs, with the sandstone cliffs rising behind the springs. What appears to be my body slathered in mud is actually the exploded remnants of my colon. Actually, it really is mud. My colon has never been so happy.
A PERFECT DAY FOR YOUR COLON IN NORTHERN NEW MEXICO
1. Start your day with a colon-blackening beef brisket burrito at Sugar's on the low road between Taos and Santa Fe. We stopped here twice, once on the way to the Pecos Wilderness via Taos, and again on the way down to Ojo Caliente Hot Springs. The smokehouse advertises itself. The brisket spends two days in the smoker, accumulating enough tar to transform your colon into a hazardous waste site. Make sure to get a side of Sugar's sweet, slightly spicy sauce to go with the accompanying green chile sauce.
Me holding an imaginary brisket burrito in front of Sugar's. The burrito has already been vaporized, along with my colon. I made sure to get another burrito to go, since my digestive system had already become a demolition zone, anyway.
2. Purge and purify your colon with a detoxifying mudbath at Oyo Caliente Hot Springs. Douse yourself in in the iron, iron/arsenic, and soda pools to aid in the resurrection of your colon. Drink copious quantities of springwater from the Lithia spring to deal with the post-traumatic stress of finishing your second "to go" burrito.
Me at Oyo Caliente Hot Springs, with the sandstone cliffs rising behind the springs. What appears to be my body slathered in mud is actually the exploded remnants of my colon. Actually, it really is mud. My colon has never been so happy.
posted by Franz K at 6:36 PM
2 Comments:
I'm so happy that your colon is happy. I bet that you are over titillated that you can hear yourself having a happy colon!!
AI love reading your blog, your writing style is unparalleled when it comes and I look forward to reading more about your $50 grand sound system.
I agree with abbie. your writing style is unparalleled when it comes.
-guy hogan
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